What if I get a job and it doesn't work out?

Hi, I have been unemployed for around a decade. I am in support group of ESA. I have bipolar and have not had any decent spell of stability. Recently, I felt quite good, although it was only for a short time. In this time, I applied for a job. Then my mood began to drop again. To cut a long story short, I don't know if I will hear from them, I don't know that I will be fit even if I do hear from them. However, it got me to thinking....this is the first time in that decade that I have even been able to think about getting back to work, so maybe I am a work in progress....getting there at snails pace but getting there all the same.

What I am afraid of....say for example, this job I applied for.....say that I got it.....and then in a short period of time, I discovered that I actually wasn't able to manage it and because of illness, had to leave. Would I have to go through all the benefit application process from the beginning again? I have been through two ESA interviews and one PIP interview.....and they made me ill. Really ill. I ended up in hospital. The ESA have left me alone for a few years....I don't know why....but the PIP I will get called round about August.

Today someone suggested to me doing a few hours permitted hours work instead. I don't know much about it and I am frightened to rock the boat....but part of me would like to see if I could manage a little something, maybe just not a full time job just quite yet. Again, I am frightened of say I do 2 hours a week permitted hours, if they would then decide that if I can do that then surely I can work full time?

I don't think I am being overly suspicious of them. My ESA interviews were HORRIBLE. I was even asked why I am not dead yet. When I asked what she meant she said "Well, you have taken all these overdoses. Surely if you wanted to be dead you would have managed it by now?" She also took my hand and ran her finger across the palm of it. She explained "If your palm was sweating, it would indicate that you are maybe lying." There is a whole catalogue of things.....So I am frightened of having to convince these people that I am not lying, that I do have a variable serious health condition and that not succeeding in suicide attempts does not equate to being well! So....you can see why I am frightened of rocking the boat.

Thank you so much for replying.

I will check out the section on permitted work in a bit.

I feel so trapped by this system. Part of me wonders if work would be the best thing for me. Work was such a big part of my life before....although it contributed to me getting ill, no doubt. People who have not been through the process do not understand just how stressful it is. They say "Well, as long as you are not lying" but the system assumes you are....it is up to the individual to prove they are not.
I don't want to be relying on benefits for the rest of my life.....but if I did have to....I don't want to be living in fear either.

You say permitted work would not affect my ESA claim....but I know someone who took on a permitted hours job and the next thing was the DWP changed her ESA to UC and decided she was fit for work! She was basically given a job....is now off sick and having an incredibly hard time!
I am in a UC area. I would LOVE to take on a couple of hours doing something. I would LOVE to earn even an extra tenner a week (I am skint! LOL!) I would love to do something other than my voluntary work to get a reference (I was sacked on health grounds from my last job) but sooooo frightened!

Thank you Gordon.

on the face of it...it seems a no brainer. It isn't really. My big problem is I think I have been so scarred by the application process, that it is paralysing me from moving on.