Worried & Broken [ESA Stopped]

I'm hoping that someone can help me as I'm at a loss on what to do next, I've had a few sleepless nights and been in bits. I'm completely broken and never ever felt like this in my life I feel totally worthless and totally upset what the DWP have done to me.

I recently applied for ESA after being dismissed due to ill health with the company I worked for over 10 years. I've been suffering from disc issues including disc degeneration for several years however most recently it become severe due to a herinated disc and I was dianosed with severe spinal stenosis.

I received urgent surgery in spring 2013 due to screaming in pain after waking up one morning being unable to move from bed, I was scheduled for urgent surgery. The surgery was a slight success, whilst the offending disc was removed and I was able to sit up without scremaing out pain I was still in bad pain when moving around and wasn't able to sit at my desk for any longer than half an hour. I was advised told to use crutches to help me move around even due to being unsteady on my feet.

I was then given a further spinal injection due to continuation of the issue but this did not really help and I was struggling daily.

In December due to not being able to complete my job I was dismissed from my role, I was devastated after working for the same company and the people that I worked with but accepted the fact that I could no longer complete my role.

I applied for ESA in January and was placed on the assessment rate, I received the ESA50 form which I completed and sent off. I included my recent operations / surgeries and how the issue affected both my legs being unable to walk much less than 50 metres without being in pain and being unable to sit / stand for any length of time. I also included my MRIs post surgery showing severe spinal stenosis which was causing siatica. I had a fall in January which also caused issues on the oppsosite leg due to being unsteady on my feet. This also included my medications.

Whilst checking my documents it also appears the DWP wrote to my doctors in which they confirmed the issues I was having with severe pain, confirmed the surgeries and that I was still having chronic pain. They also checked the box "moving around" and "transferring between seats"

The only ease I get is when I lye completely flat in bed which seems to take the pressure off my back, in the meantime I've been put back under my consultant for another mri scan and may require further surgery although I'm on the waiting list for the appointment.

I currently use aids including my crutches, a stool for my shower so I can sit and wash myself and a raised toilet seat due to having issues getting up off the toilet being too low down for my back. I use various other aids to get dressed but at present don't really go out as I really struggle at the moment on a daily basis.

I receievd the assessment call whilst lying down in bed and was told that another person would also be on the call in the background and if I had any objections I said no as I didn't feel this would cause any issues.

I was on the phone for over an hour we went through the whole form. Various times I was placed on the hold whilst the advisor needed to speak with someone, on the call I was asked where I recieved my equipment and aids from was from (my physiotherpaist & online for other items) why wasn't this issued by the council and if my home was adaoted and if not why not. I was asked why I didn't attend A&E due to my recent fall. I was then asked why I had not been referred to the pain clinic (I stated that I didn't want to put on further medication due to the strong opioids I was currently on).

I was asked if I ever leave the house and how long many minutes I could walk before, I stated that I've never timed myself I rarely leave the house due to the pain, the advisor well how many minutes can you walk? 10 - 15 minutes? I stated I could walk for possibly a minute before needing to rest a minute and then another minute but that I would still be in pain.

I then received a call last week from the DWP to ask if I had any new conditions since sending the form (I did not) the person then stated that my ESA benefit was being stopped immediately and that I should apply for JSA, I broke down in tears and told them I didn't know what to do there is no way I could work in the state I am in at present due to the constant pain I'm in. The only advise I was told was to request a reconsideration once I receive the letter in the post but that this would take some time.

My sick note is still live for a further 4 months so I don't even know how I could apply for JSA but even if I did I doubt I could do any role lying down in bed as I still cannot sit for any lenth of time or move around.

I tried calling the citizens advice for any help on what to do but I couldn't get through due to how busy they were.

I've actually made myself more ill as I havent been able to eat or drink for the past few days even though as silly as it sounds due to the stress its caused.

Are there any local companies that help with reconsiderations? I would be at a loss on how to complete the mandatory reconideration.

Thank you for any help anyone can offer x